tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-70849855939579059692024-03-12T19:41:52.064-07:00everydayBAPORK PRODUCTS IN PADELLAS PACHYNSIZING YOUR PACABLE PAUNCH~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-1023108832820234252011-04-03T14:09:00.000-07:002011-04-03T14:09:57.734-07:00BACON: THE GATEWAY MEAT?<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">They say marijuana is the gateway drug.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Naw, BACON IS! And I'll prove it by quoting this article:</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #555555; line-height: 20px;"><a href="http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2011/02/02/133304206/why-bacon-is-a-gateway-to-meat-for-vegetarians"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2011/02/02/133304206/why-bacon-is-a-gateway-to-meat-for-vegetarians</span></a></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #555555; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><b><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #555555; line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>"90 percent of what we taste is really odor, bacon's aggressive smell delivers a powerful hit to our sense of how good it will taste."</b></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; line-height: 20px;">The odoriferous potency of bacon is like a blowjob for your nose. Not quite sex, but close enough. And let's be honest here, once you've had sex, you never go back to those virgin days.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><b><br />
</b></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>""I have long thought if for some reason I ever started eating meat again, I would start with bacon.""</b></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; line-height: 20px;">QUOTIN' A QUOTE! Not quite like marijuana, i'll admit. Bacon is more like the start and the end in an endless loop of bacon.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; line-height: 20px;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><b>"bacon is one- to two-thirds fat and also has lots of protein, it speaks to our evolutionary quest for calories" </b></span> </span><br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Bacon is synonymous with manliness. What does marijuana say to our evolutionary quest? NOTHING, unless you're a delusional hippy who convinced him/herself that eating little flowers is good for you. </span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And if those reason weren't enough, check out the full article, it's some interesting stuff ( I hit all the highlights).</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh and, did you know pigs are good swimmers?</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c;"><object class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="http://3.gvt0.com/vi/UZY1W_iEUhc/0.jpg" height="266" width="320"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/UZY1W_iEUhc&fs=1&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/UZY1W_iEUhc&fs=1&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It's a sea of BACON!</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f9cb9c; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, how could bacon get any better?</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #555555; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 20px;"><b><br />
</b></span></span>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-42442950751861602912011-04-01T20:33:00.000-07:002011-04-01T20:33:22.790-07:00SCENT BY THE GODSI apologize for missing two daily posts, there was a power outage at my house.<br />
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Naw, I was too busy applying BACON COLOGNE. SCENT BY THE GODS. Seriously though, there was an outage. But I digress, BACON COLOGNE!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.thesmokingjacket.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/fargginay-thumb1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://www.thesmokingjacket.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/fargginay-thumb1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">HOLY BALLS OF ZEUS!</div><div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Men LOVE the smell of bacon. Women LOVE men. EVERYONE SHOULD SMELL LIKE BACON.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">It'll get you laid.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">It'll land you a six figure job.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">It'll take you and your entourage of the world's elite to the top of the world where you drink bacon-flavored red wine and dine on finely roasted strips of swine whom were handpicked by the god of the Sun, Apollo, who fried it himself with the force of a thousand suns. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In the least, it'll make you pretty damn hungry. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Here's where to buy it: </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.fargginay.com/shop-1.html">http://www.fargginay.com/shop-1.html</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">So, would you spray?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-44750281098736201182011-03-29T19:46:00.000-07:002011-03-29T19:46:26.670-07:00Sir Francis BACON.Sir Francis Bacon was the father of empiricism and famous for the scientific method.<br />
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Naw, he was famous for the BACONIAN method, which I imagine was some revolutionary way to both cook and consume bacon.<br />
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Bacon Peanut Brittle was developed at the height of his career.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://ep.yimg.com/ca/I/yhst-76002650168316_2149_7298881" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://ep.yimg.com/ca/I/yhst-76002650168316_2149_7298881" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>I'm not sayin Bacon Peanut Brittle is as big of an invention as general anesthesia, I'm sayin it's bigger.<br />
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Francis wrote plays about his love of bacon. The fat cats up top were so pleased, they knighted him.<br />
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Two star-crossed lovers, cafe bacon and mums bacon, who's death ultimately united all bacon lovers. Shakespeare stole his ideas and dumbed it down a little bit so the peons of the day who had never tasted such heavenly a treat could relate.<br />
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Francis didn't give a fuck. He had the respect of the elite, the freemasons, and they snacked on Sir Francis' Bacon Peanut Brittle while discussing world domination.<br />
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Unfortunately, Bacon contracted pneumonia while studying the effects of freezing on the preservation of meat. Such dedication would surely have led to many more bacon-related discoveries. To him, we owe it all.<br />
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Fortunately, the internet knows all and the secret bacon peanut brittle has now been mass-produced for our enjoyment. Check it out here:<br />
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<a href="http://www.baconfreak.com/094922285379.html">http://www.baconfreak.com/094922285379.html</a><br />
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The site has plenty of bacon goodies which I'll cover at a later time, when I'm not so intoxcitated.<br />
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So, how much are you buying? I'm gettin a couple pounds.~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-65008770019476845692011-03-28T18:19:00.000-07:002011-03-28T18:19:30.275-07:00BACON ICE CREAM<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">HUMAN breast milk ice cream is a wonderful and healthy creation. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/L6Txe2qbejo?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Naw, WHAT THE FUCK LONDON? You got me all paranoid up in this bitch. To me it's like, well, who's breast milk is it? I mean, is it from Angelina Jolie? OR, is it Queen Latifah? </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://blackgaygossip.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/queen-latifah-bday1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://blackgaygossip.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/queen-latifah-bday1.jpg" width="199" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Honestly, it doesn't matter. The breast milk shit is a publicity stunt and it's taking attention away from more deserving stories. Namely, BACON ICE CREAM.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.foodchannel.com/articles/article/give-bacon-ice-cream-a-try/">http://www.foodchannel.com/articles/article/give-bacon-ice-cream-a-try/</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.foodchannel.com/files/0001/0659/box_BaconIceCream.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://www.foodchannel.com/files/0001/0659/box_BaconIceCream.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
Do you feel that? My heart just skipped a beat. I think I'm in love. This is the kind of feeling authors write novels about. This is the kind of groundbreaking invention that nobel prizes are given to. This is the kind of gourmet treat that starts lifelong binge-eating.<br />
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I wrote a poem.<br />
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Roses are Red,<br />
Violets are Violet,<br />
Bacon ice cream in my bed,<br />
Bacon ice cream, get under my blanket.<br />
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<br />
So two questions today:<br />
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What do you think of breast milk and bacon ice creams?<br />
Would you eat it?~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-41987969560660345472011-03-27T18:06:00.000-07:002011-03-27T18:06:30.364-07:00WATCHOO KNOW ABOUT BACON?There's nothing more disgusting than playing with your food.<br />
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Naw, there's playing with your food while filming it and posting it on youtube afterwards, which is EXACTLY what the guys at Epic Meal Time do. Just a warning, they really step it up.<br />
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<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/FlN4Ho50abA?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>Anything from adorable meat cars to pure meat salads, these guys create the meaty concoctions that you've always dreamed of. What's more, they're crazy about BACON. OBLIGATORY BACON STRIPS SPAM:<br />
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BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS & BACON STRIPS.<br />
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If you've seen their videos, you get the joke. If you haven't, do you like it dirty? Do you like it smothered? Do you enjoy watching a bunch of bearded men play with their meat together? Of course you do. Satisfaction is GARUANTEED. check it out. <br />
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Their slogan is : We make your dreams come true, and then we eat them.<br />
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So, would you eat it?~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com29tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-35147556835204990022011-03-26T15:04:00.000-07:002011-03-26T15:14:36.520-07:00IM ADDICTED TO BACONThey say nicotine, heroine, and coke are some of the most addictive drugs. ever.<br />
<div><br />
</div><div>Naw, BACON IS! FUCK YOU SCIENCE!</div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">5 signs of ADDICTION:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">Withdrawal -- The severity of withdrawal symptoms produced by stopping the use of the drug.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">Reinforcement -- The drug's tendency to induce users to take it again and again.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">Tolerance -- The user's need to have ever-increasing doses to get the same effect.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">Dependence -- The difficulty in quitting, or staying off the drug, the number of users who eventually become dependent</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">Intoxication -- The degree of intoxication produced by the drug in typical use.</span></div><div><br />
</div><div>SELF-DIAGNOSIS (BACK OFF WEBMD, I GOT THIS):</div><div><br />
</div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"></span><br />
<pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Withdrawal:10/10, I'M ALWAYS AT THE SUPERMARKET, GETTIN MY DAILY FIX.</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Reinforcement: 10/10, I CAN'T STOP EATING BACON.</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Tolerance: 0/10, bacon would NEVER demand me to fry more bacon for the same greasy goodness</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dependence: 10/10, I can't quit. A day without bacon is like a day without....bacon.DAMN. </span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Intoxication: 10/10 Dude, we about to get FRIED.</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">TOTAL: 40/50. According to my calculations, that's a B. FOR BACON. I ACED THAT TEST.</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In celebration, here's "A SIZZLIN BACON RAP SONG" TO TICKLE YOUR MIND...AND TASTE BUDS.</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: x-small;"><b>
</b></span></span></pre><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"><object class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="http://2.gvt0.com/vi/TXxFbp5rY_o/0.jpg" height="266" width="320"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/TXxFbp5rY_o&fs=1&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/TXxFbp5rY_o&fs=1&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object></span></div><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: x-small;"><b>
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</b></span></span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, how addicted are you?</span></pre><pre width="132"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New'; font-size: x-small;"><b>
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</b></span></span></pre></div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-38130864272635967612011-03-25T14:24:00.000-07:002011-03-25T14:24:46.472-07:00CONDIMENTSSometimes bacon just isn't good by itself and we need to add a bit of pepper.<div><br />
</div><div>Naw, FALSE, on TWO accounts. FIRST, bacon is great by itself. SECOND, the only thing that could accompany bacon is MORE bacon. </div><div><br />
</div><div>I present to you, BACON CONDIMENTS: </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.jdfoods.net/images/logo-baconnaise-blk.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.jdfoods.net/images/logo-baconnaise-blk.gif" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.jdfoods.net/images/logo-baconranch-blk.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.jdfoods.net/images/logo-baconranch-blk.gif" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.jdfoods.net/images/logo-baconsalt-blk.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.jdfoods.net/images/logo-baconsalt-blk.gif" /></a></div><div><br />
</div><div>After eating bacon strips covered in bacon condiments. you proceed to sprinkle bacon salt into your mouth and dip your fingers in bacon ranch. Then, BACONNAISE SHOTS! Drink it up! Drinking baconnaise to you is a lot like having sex on a boat. IT'S FUCKING CLOSE TO WATER. </div><div><br />
</div><div>You already want it, so I won't say any more. Here's a link to some bacon condiments: </div><div><br />
</div><div><a href="http://www.baconnaise.com/">http://www.baconnaise.com/</a></div><div><br />
</div><div>Those were just 3 of my favorites, the site has plenty more to choose from.</div><div><br />
</div><div>SO, would you condimize it? </div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com48tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-28127017044578952942011-03-24T13:34:00.000-07:002011-03-24T13:34:37.033-07:00Make BACON, not warThe war in Libya has escalated, and the civilians have stocked up on popular food items, especially canned goods.<div><br />
</div><div>Naw, they're bringing in the BACON. TACTICAL BACON!</div><div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/products/zoom/c399_tactical_canned_bacon.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/products/zoom/c399_tactical_canned_bacon.jpg" width="300" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">TACBAC, abbreviated because less is more. More because there's half a pound of pure pre-cooked pig in this package. FUCKIN' ALLITERATION.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">TACBAC is synonymous with wine, it gets better with age. Preservable for 10 years! Enjoy a prolonged snack in your jacuzzi and fancy mansion surrounded by your loved ones (playboy bunnies) or pop a can open in the heat of battle and watch as fighting ceases and everyone sings to the tune of kumbaya while you pass around the lard and pig fat. FUCKIN' WAR HERO.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">But seriously guys, shit's legit. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Here's a youtube review of the TACBAC by some random asian:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkMYmmN9PwA">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkMYmmN9PwA</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">SO, TACBAC, great invention, or greatest? </div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com38tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-46374072102291523162011-03-23T13:21:00.000-07:002011-03-23T13:21:15.008-07:00ACCESSORIZESo aside from bacon tabs and bacon lingerie, the world hasn't been very creative.<br />
<br />
Naw, the world is BURSTING from its busty seams with wondrous creativity.<br />
<br />
THE GAME DONE CHANGED.<br />
<br />
<br />
BACON BANDAGES: NATURE'S CHOICE FOR HEALING ALL WOUNDS<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/product_images/c/044/11476__62398_zoom.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/product_images/c/044/11476__62398_zoom.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">BACON MINTS: THE KING OF BREATH MINTS, GUARANTEED TO GET YOU LAID LIKE A KING WITH LARRY KING IN A BURGER KING BATHROOM MUNCHIN ON YOUR KING-SIZED, BACON-FLAVORED CANDY BAR. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/product_images/k/286/11706__53303_zoom.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/product_images/k/286/11706__53303_zoom.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">BACON BELT: ASSONANCE </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/product_images/n/309/11938_90559_thumb__61345_zoom.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/product_images/n/309/11938_90559_thumb__61345_zoom.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Those were just some of my favorite bacon-themed accessories. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">There's a PLETHORA of BACON-themed goodies at this site, which shares my love of bacon: </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/categories/Awesome-Stuff/Bacon-&-Meat">http://www.mcphee.com/shop/categories/Awesome-Stuff/Bacon-&-Meat</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">So, just one question guys, would you buy it?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com43tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-72408683674495677242011-03-22T13:31:00.000-07:002011-03-22T13:31:42.841-07:00BACON TABSJudging from the responses to my last post, it seems like some lines were crossed and some bloggers were offended. And I concluded bacon isn't great on everything.<div><br />
</div><div>Naw, you can NEVER have enough bacon. What was once an edible product limited to consumption in its solid form is now available as a liquid. </div><div><br />
</div><div>I present to you: BACON TABS</div><div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/products/frontsquare/e678_fizzy_bacon_drink_tablets.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/products/frontsquare/e678_fizzy_bacon_drink_tablets.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Looks look sprite, TASTES LIKE BACON.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Clear as water, ORGASMIC AS BACON.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Same old fizz, BRAND NEW SLAUGHTEREDPIGSCONDENSEDINTOTABLETFORM.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.thinkgeek.com/interests/retro/e678/">http://www.thinkgeek.com/interests/retro/e678/</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">So, would you drink it?</div><div><br />
</div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com58tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-86147209582680619562011-03-21T20:08:00.000-07:002011-03-21T20:08:20.726-07:00everydayBA-CON LINGERIESo I've read through the replies and it's unanimous, this blog is now about bears. bigass bears that'll eat you right up without a second thought.<br />
<br />
Naw, it's about BACON. And to be more specific, BACON STRIPS, THE WORLD'S MOST VERSATILE INVENTION. EVER.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://bacontoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/BACON-BRA-pic-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://bacontoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/BACON-BRA-pic-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEir0yiC6S9zCKP3zhAqUidQo1CVLdcgr9r3NIvOAGkeqIcsV_9uCsECUZ5l0l8M2kYQyx4uU4f_IClYJlz1i8OKSFDANaJSprXa7_yCpKppfw2yn1irG38rZyYAbXJAdFvTutaAfOwnolRB/s400/185566-bacon_bikini.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEir0yiC6S9zCKP3zhAqUidQo1CVLdcgr9r3NIvOAGkeqIcsV_9uCsECUZ5l0l8M2kYQyx4uU4f_IClYJlz1i8OKSFDANaJSprXa7_yCpKppfw2yn1irG38rZyYAbXJAdFvTutaAfOwnolRB/s320/185566-bacon_bikini.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">HERE'S TO BACON! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">BACON STRIPS look good on anything, but SHOULD be on EVERYTHING.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">And as these images clearly depict, BACON STRIPS are synonymous with SEX.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">So, there's only one thing left to ask, would you eat it?</div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-32699733004201204052011-03-21T14:00:00.000-07:002011-03-21T14:00:33.227-07:00Blog Theme.After starting this blogging biz, I've been so excited. I went to school grinning from ear-to-ear and told everyone about my new blog. <div><br />
</div><div>Naw. I told fucking no one. But I did think about my new blog and where it's going. I realized I needed a theme for my blog.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Right now, I'm thinking about centering topics around my name, everydayBA. BA stands for badass and I'd probably just recount humorous situations from the day. </div><div><br />
</div><div>And then I realized, most of my humor is for guys. I'd be shunning half of my (potential) audience!</div><div><br />
</div><div>But, fuck it. After all, I'm going to write about what I enjoy. Things such as:</div><div><br />
</div><div>BACON STRIPS. </div><div>SMOKING.</div><div>BACON STRIPS.</div><div>DRINKING.</div><div>BACON STRIPS.</div><div>AND MANLY THINGS.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Anyway, leave a comment about what you think and offer some suggestions for themes.</div><div><br />
</div><div>Thanks, I'm all ears. </div>~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com26tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7084985593957905969.post-71959272872286158352011-03-20T20:56:00.000-07:002011-03-20T20:56:42.784-07:00I've got a cold. Or maybe it's allergies?Woke up. Drank three bottles of water and proceeded to drink half a gallon of orange juice. Popped some Tylenol, Mucinex, and Benadryl just because I like the name.<br />
<br />
Naw, who am I kidding, I fucking love Benadryl. I don't even have allergies. Come to think of it, no one in my family does. But you know what I do have (and this applies to the rest of my family as well)?<br />
<br />
Too much money and a deep love for deceptive commercials. Have you ever seen a Benadryl commercial? Shit's crazy bro. It starts off with those little helicopter things that twirl after you throw them in the air and it's accompanied by the sound of REAL helicopters, which is how I always imagined it anyway. And that's when you know. That field full of flowers you're standing in is a fucking war zone. Those blades of grass are lethal. That pollen in the air might as well be poisonous gas. Those pea plants are the miniguns of mother nature. As if that wasn't enough, they pull out the slow motion as the little helicopters collide with the dandelions. SOUND EFFECTS! Every hit is like a cannon ball making contact with the poop deck of a pirate ship. This commercial has got me more terrified than blackbeard's pubic hair.<br />
<br />
OH, Benadryl you're such a tease. The commercial ends with "Win the War Against Allergies." Shieeeeeeeeeeet. I almost wish I had allergies. Oh well, didn't stop me from taking them.<br />
<br />
God, I'm so satisfied. Benadryl is medicinal gold. With that being said, Tylenol, Mucinex, and Benadryl must be the damn holy trinity of over-the-counter drugs. I feel like I died and went to Heaven, where there's nothing but strips of bacon as far as the eye can see. And you know what? I'm the goddamn juggernaut of bacon eating, destined to consume bacon for the rest of eternity. Who cares if I'm morbidly obese, I'm dead anyway. Indulge your gluttony.<br />
<br />
Speaking of gluttony, I've been deprived of it for today. I can't really eat anything without it painfully scraping down my throat. Feels like the food turned into goddamn razorblades as it makes its way down my esophagus. I'm starting to taste the pulp in pulp-free orange juice. The bullshit organic soy-milk my mom insists on buying tastes like sour-ass whole milk filled with milk curds. And drinking water's like trying to stand below a waterfall with my head back.<br />
<br />
Yeah, I've got a drinking problem. And that's probably where this cold really started, I tried to cut down on drinking. Since swim season ended and my weak, asian body will inevitably morph back to having the physique of a prepubescent 12 year old, I didn't want a beer belly on top of it all.<br />
<br />
Convenient, with St. Patty's being the perfect excuse. Green beer looks like vomit anyway. So, I decided to switch over to something that's naturally green, or purple.<br />
<br />
Oh, here's to an epic pun: "I call my weed the Quran, cause burning this shit will get you stoned."<br />
<br />
And that's what we did. After a few bowls of cereal, we couldn't feel our legs.<br />
Dank. Ass. Shit. I mean, I couldn't even stand up straight. Being so high and so damn tall don't go well together.<br />
<br />
I visited the Sears Tower in Chicago a few days back. They've got a new skydeck where it's just a thin layer of glass separating you from a 1500 foot drop. I'm not really scared of heights, so I stood on the edge of that shit like that bitch did on the cover of Titanic. Didn't feel a thing.<br />
<br />
And that's when you know that you've had too much: when leaning over the skydeck of the Sears Tower doesn't scare you and tokin so much that you can't even stand up straight because you're dizzier than D!zZy D.<br />
<br />
I woke up the next morning. Drank three bottles of water and proceeded to drink half a gallon of orange juice. Popped some Tylenol, Mucinex, and Benadryl just because I like the name.<br />
<br />
Yeah, I've got a cold. Or maybe it's allergies?~DShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17086479508494414789noreply@blogger.com18